“There’s nothing more we can do for you at this time,” Dr. Mackle said. I had been sitting in the upright chair just inside the entrance of a narrow consulting room. I didn’t look at him – hadn’t been expecting those words. I didn’t know how to respond since it never occurred to me that my hepatologist could run out of possible solutions; that I could run out of options. I said nothing. He rested his hand on my shoulder.
The unexpected words hung in the air then followed him out of the room. I was left to wait.
Sometimes there is nothing left to do but wait. The arsenal of medications already spilling out of my cupboards help some but can’t make the problems go away.
So, on the good days I relish life – as much as I can and on the not-so-good days, I just wait. At least, I’ve begun to learn how.
\Weyt\ Verb: to look forward expectantly; a state or attitude of watchfulness and expectancy; to remain in a state of repose until something expected happens.
The way I see it, waiting doesn’t mean not doing anything. It calls for strenuous mental and emotional spunk and is probably one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do.
Unfortunately, waiting is not our default setting (it feels too good to be up and getting things done). But you know what I realized? Waiting doesn’t have to mean time-wasting. There is a lot to be learned during the waiting period, if we adopt the right attitude.
Waiting unfolds patience and humility and courage and tolerance and faith and . . . a whole lot of other stuff unique to your situation.
So switch off the helplessness of ‘victim’ and switch on the authority of learner. Swap out the ‘poor-me‘ whines for the ‘what am I supposed to learn from this‘ questioning.
Switch off impatience and switch on contentment (not to be confused with hopelessness). It’s okay to wait.
Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord! Psalms 27:14
Switch off anxiety and switch on anticipation. Instead of the query ‘when?’ make it the qualifier of your goal – the beginning of your plan ‘when I . . . .’ And visualize yourself as you will be.
If you don’t like where you are, just picture yourself where you want to be. Auggie in Wonder.
Every day won’t be a “good” day, especially with a chronic illness.
Here are 9 thoughts I think will help you on your way.
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